Whiskey Tim

I always thought that I could do better than my parents generation. Growing up I regularly saw my parents and others their age struggling to pay the bills, looking for bargains and never going on lavish vacations. I thought to myself, I will never be like that. Even in recent years, when my parents would go to the grocery store and buy the generic supermarket brand, I used to think to myself, I will never buy that stuff. I'll always buy the good stuff. But as I’ve come of age, I’ve realized that chances are, I will probably end up just like them. The real pisser of it all is that understanding this lead me to a much greater realization.

I think that I am afraid of succeeding.

One of my biggest problems is that I don’t like responsibility. There are many things I’d like to do, but I resist because I don’t want the power to impact, hurt, or disappoint other people. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have dreams--it’s just that I’m scared of what achieving them will entail. If you can relate to this feeling, al salute, and excuse me while I pour another glass........

It's funny, if you play it safe, you won’t hurt or disappoint anyone, but you also won’t help or inspire anyone. And equally important, you won’t help or inspire yourself. So as I take another quick shot and lay it all out to you in this pathetic blog, I can only hope that someone will be inspired. Shit, I'll even settle for amused. Until next time...

Go Fuck Yourselves,

"Nobody likes you. You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Now smile, you fucking douche." - Hank Moody

Everyone needs a mantra, right? Like Hank's, that one is mine. What? Would you prefer it was: "I love myself. I am filled with compassion for others. I am present now."

Sorry, but I don't believe in all that hippie shit. I mean, who are we kidding? Tell yourself whatever lies you like to help you sleep better at night but I prefer the harsh truth. One of my harsh truths is that I over complicate my life. I wish that I could go one day without the constant internal dialogue that plagues my every thought. Not the crazy "I hear voices" dialogue, rather the kind that tends to make me over analyze every decision. I'm sure everyone has a similar voice. Hopefully a much quieter one. Thankfully though, the whiskey tames mine. Tonight I hear nothing but the sounds of the ice rattling in my glass and the faint tones of the Beatles playing on my stereo. And since this magical potion is starting to take affect, I think it would be a good time to give you some harsh truths. So here goes...

1) Friends come and go.

2) You won't always get what you want (or deserve).

3) Many people will love you, plenty will not.

4) Nobody can transform your life like you can.

5) Rain will sometimes cancel play.

6) You are going to fail.

7) There may be no tomorrow.

8) Someone will always have more.

Most of these truths are common sense or nothing many of us don't already know. There is no doubt that life has its ups and downs. I guess all we can do is hold on tight and ask that in the end, the love we take be equal to the love we make. Until next time...

Go Fuck Yourselves,

WT

"So what he/she keeps talking about you and hating on you. What do you think a hater's job is...to hate. If you have someone hating on you right now you better think of how to get five more people hating by Christmas. You need haters to make you stronger...without haters most people wouldn't try to become better. Just tell them bitch you just hate me because you can't be me." - Katt Williams

I couldn't have said it any better, Katt. I have haters too. My current count is 17. I could name names but that's not my steelo. In order to reach your highest potential, you have to get and stay motivated every day. Some days, the work of greatness will come easily to you. You will be so enamored with the worth of your mission that you will be able to push forward with ease. Some days, however, your motivation will wane, your step will drag, and your courage will weaken. These are the days in which you may need to use every trick in your book to stay motivated. These are the days in which haters are the most useful to you. Your haters are waiting for you to quit, waiting for you to admit that they were right all along about you. Will you let them have the satisfaction? Your haters are on standby waiting to stand over you after you’ve fallen from the mountain up which they were too frightened or too lazy to climb. Will you sit still for the diss? I sure as fuck won't.

Until next time...

Refer to the topic of this post,
Whiskey Tim

Life is complicated. People come, people go, and not everything is as it seems. You don't have to be Aristotle or Einstein to come to that conclusion. I heard a funny story the other day that made me think...

"A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out. He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him."

Now take what you want from this story, but I left thinking three things:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut

It's funny how one day life can seem utterly perfect and stable and then the next, it can turn to shit, turmoil, chaos and downright desperation. But fortunately/unfortunately, life is long. And if we're lucky enough, we learn from it. What have you learned?

Until next time...

Go Fuck Yourselves,
Whiskey Tim

For those who knew me growing up, I was a scrawny, shy, mush-mouth of a kid. I didn't come from money. I had genetics working against me. Trust me, no one was looking for me. Yet despite all of this, I was picky as hell. I only went after girls that were completely out of my league. I set high expectations and settled for nothing less. So naturally the only females that gave me the time of day were 3's and 4's (at best). I remember one time in middle school I was asked to a dance by this chick named Susan. Now Susan had a lot of things going for her - she was smart, played the violin, spoke three different languages - ah who am I kidding...I'm reaching for nice things to say. In all honesty she was a beast of a girl with a thick unibrow and yellow teeth that looked like someone pissed all over them. I, of course, asked Amy - the hottest and most popular girl in school. Long story short, I said no to Susan. Amy said no to me.

At the end of the day, my grandfather came to pick me up from school. He could sense that I was confused and distraught by what had played out so he proceeded to ask what was wrong. I told him what happened and he very casually looked at me and said, "life is too short to dance with fat girls." At the time, I'm sure I took his words in the literal sense but I really didn't understand what he meant until just recently. He was trying to say that life is all about priorities. It is important to have a clear sense of what matters to you. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. With age and maturity, our priorities change. I know mine sure did.

My grandfather passed away last month. Today would be his 88th birthday. So tonight I pour this glass of whiskey to my gramps, to Susan, and to my priorities. Until next time....

Go Fuck Yourselves,
Whiskey Tim

Tom Petty sure as shit couldn't have said it any better....

"you don't know how it feels to be me."

You can go your whole life with people telling you who you are, what you want, and how to do things. Now I'm not trying to get too deep tonight as I'm sure the whiskey is fueling this diatribe but if you ask me, I say fuck them. Fuck them in their stupid assholes. Case and point, the other day a complete stranger approached me as he was entering the train and mumbled "you don't belong here." Now when you live in NYC you hear all types of shit and see all types of crazy people. Some funny as hell, others quite disturbing. To be fair, I wasn't sure if the old man was talking to himself, to me, or the person standing next to me. Regardless, it shook me. The rest of the day went on like any other day but no matter what I was doing, in the back of my mind, I thought about what the old man said. And it made me question: "Why am I here?" "What the hell am I doing in this place?" "Am I in the right job, relationship, financial state?" "Do I have any idea what the next step is?" In full panic mode and near Xanax popping, I went to play some Howard Stern Show on my iPhone (as this tends to calm me down and escape whatever reality I'm trying to escape from). The opening song was Petty. Suddenly, it all made sense. No, I don't know. And it's okay not to. We have all felt this way (some more than others) at times but take comfort in knowing that we don't have to have all the answers. Sometimes, it's the questions that matter. Follow your heart and eventually you'll get it right. When all else fails, roll another joint, pour a glass of whisk and turn the radio loud. Until next time...

Go Fuck Yourselves,
Whiskey Tim

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TlBTPITo1I

I wish I could tell you where it began. How it all got started. The moment it clicked. For now, let's just say that it was about 5 years ago. A man on a journey in an unfamiliar city with no clear direction and a couple hundred bucks in his pocket. As this story unfolds, we will learn a lot more about this man and perhaps we can help him answer these key questions: What happened that night? Who was involved? Where did it all go so terribly wrong? What was her name? I can't tell you these answers just yet. But if I can "borrow" a few lines from a genius, what I can tell you is that...

Tim hates you all.

A few things that I've learned on my travels through this crazy little thing called life. One, a morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness. Two, I probably won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister. And three, while I'm down there it might be nice to see a hint of pubis. I'm not talking about a huge 70's Playboy bush or anything. Just something that reminds me that I'm performing cunnilingus on an adult. But I guess the larger question is why is this big apple so rotten?
Until next time...

Go Fuck Yourselves,
Whiskey Tim