Whiskey Tim

For those who knew me growing up, I was a scrawny, shy, mush-mouth of a kid. I didn't come from money. I had genetics working against me. Trust me, no one was looking for me. Yet despite all of this, I was picky as hell. I only went after girls that were completely out of my league. I set high expectations and settled for nothing less. So naturally the only females that gave me the time of day were 3's and 4's (at best). I remember one time in middle school I was asked to a dance by this chick named Susan. Now Susan had a lot of things going for her - she was smart, played the violin, spoke three different languages - ah who am I kidding...I'm reaching for nice things to say. In all honesty she was a beast of a girl with a thick unibrow and yellow teeth that looked like someone pissed all over them. I, of course, asked Amy - the hottest and most popular girl in school. Long story short, I said no to Susan. Amy said no to me.

At the end of the day, my grandfather came to pick me up from school. He could sense that I was confused and distraught by what had played out so he proceeded to ask what was wrong. I told him what happened and he very casually looked at me and said, "life is too short to dance with fat girls." At the time, I'm sure I took his words in the literal sense but I really didn't understand what he meant until just recently. He was trying to say that life is all about priorities. It is important to have a clear sense of what matters to you. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. With age and maturity, our priorities change. I know mine sure did.

My grandfather passed away last month. Today would be his 88th birthday. So tonight I pour this glass of whiskey to my gramps, to Susan, and to my priorities. Until next time....

Go Fuck Yourselves,
Whiskey Tim